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Monday, 24 April 2017

A FEW THINGS LEADING UP TO MY 20's, THAT HAVE CHANGED MY LIFE












It doesn't matter your age, your path or privileges, we will forever and ever be learning new things,  making constant mistakes and feeling every emotion there is. We'll never hold all the answers in our hands, nor ever not have a thousand questions to ask, but that's the journey, I don't think there ever really is a destination, just an adventure we're constantly on, taking a few stops along the way.

I know, I'm still very young, a lot of people still raise their eyebrows at how much us youngsters can even have been through so early on, but that's just life now, for better or worst.


mental health

Over the last few years, it's become more and more apparent just how many of us really have and do suffer with some kind of mental illness, myself included. Anxiety has been my own horrifying enemy, but also something that has also made me realise my own strength. I won't get too much into my own story of it in this post, but it was going to make or break me, it came so suddenly and I was unaware at that point nearly two years ago, what was wrong with me, I became so lost and truly did not see recovery. Through realisation and understanding, came just that, recovery and I of course felt fragile, but also different, like what really matters is within and that health wasn't only physical, but also internal. I'm different now, mostly in a really positive way, they'll always be that fear lingering around, of a breakdown, of tears and unknown sadness but as time passes I gain more and more control, more strength and more hope, more than I ever had prior my battle with anxiety.


going vegan 


Yes, I am vegan and there is no reason for you to eye roll over it. It was my own choice, a really really positive one, that happened so naturally and unexpectedly really changed me. From a young age I've always been very aware about the meat I was eating and at times it would revolt me, back home in Poland there's no let's re-shape and cover the meat in breadcrumbs so it's more bearable and innocent to eat thing going on, like there is elsewhere, you strip it, cook and eat it. So I never liked much meat, other than chicken and pepperoni on pizzas, so about nearly a year ago, I thought "that's not much to give up, I'm going to give it up" after also researching vegetarianism, so first off I went vegetarian. However within a matter of weeks I actually had to completely cut out dairy produce, because I became completely intolerant to it.

Of course my reasons that started off this change were animal rights, but also environmental factors, the more research I did throughout, made me so much more aware and inspired me in so many ways, it's altered how I look and act in many different things. I could and would never go back to being a non-vegan. It's one of the best changes of my life, I feel the best I ever have, no word of a lie.


fitness  


Oh exercise, it's been a challenge, hasn't it? We've all forced ourselves, growing up, to get into it, to look good by losing weight, we've even googled it "how to lose weight in 7 days" SEVEN DAYS, oh dear. Did you know that you could enjoy it? That you don't just have to run marathons or only go to the gym to stay fit? The best thing I ever realised, was just how much option we have in order to stay active, as well as seeing results, but not only that but when it clicked in my head, don't do it for appearance but for the strength of your body, mind & general health. That, just that is how my commitment to fitness has stuck. I absolutely love taking care of my body nowadays, to nourish the amazing home in which I have been blessed with.


the blogging community 


There's nothing better and more comforting than meeting people who get you and what you love doing, especially when it's not conventional. Over only the last few months I've had the most amazing support and love from some incredible ladies, that have helped with not only blogging but anything and everything. Their encouragement and praise, lifting one another only higher, is infectious and I am so thankful for it. When you're trying to find your way with being a blogger, and a photographer in my case too, it can get lonely not having to work around others day to day 9-5p.m. and with anxiety it can get worrying, I fear I wouldn't have pushed myself enough, or maybe I'd eventually give up, if it weren't for this beautiful little community.


not having a single clue


Slightly vague, but let me summarise, when you finish College, don't go to university and have not a fucking clue what the fuck to do. I know my interests and have always had a decent idea of what I wanted to do, but my lord, when it comes down to adulthood, 'the real world' as they call it, it is daunting. The paths in which to take are completely faded, you have endless voices and society telling you contradicting things, you realise there's no longer anymore guidance set out for you but that there's also no right or wrong way to go about your life. It is a time where you basically are starting afresh again, learning new things out in the big scary world, realising you're no longer sheltered and that adults most definitely do not have their shit together. 

This all hit me like a mother frickin' brick & contributed to my downfall with anxiety. However, not having a single clue made me say bye bye to the conventional ways of society and introduced me to a more creative world, it helped me let loose a little and be more in the moment, rather than anticipating my every move.


distance & loneliness


You'll never be prepared for the day when you realise those who you thought you'd be close with till you're old, you may not be in touch with again. We all knew people would eventually go their own ways and that it may prove difficult sometimes staying in constant touch with them, but when loneliness hits, it becomes a bigger deal. You end up questioning a lot of things, wondering why things aren't going the way you thought or how society made out they should do. 

I've always been one of those who liked time on their own, I can be social for days on end, but also love my own company for a full week; I always assumed that because of that I'd be absolutely fine when I'm ever completely alone in life. Oh how wrong I was, so naive. The fact is, we need human interaction, we crave the peace it brings us, the comfort and reassurance, as well as laughter and good times, so many of us deny it, so we've almost glamourised the idea of being alone, like it's 'cool'. It's perfectly fine to be alone or very social, there's no right or wrong, I do believe there has to be some kind of balance, from personal experience, however there's no need to label it as a trendy thing. Anyway, more so lately, I think I've found that balance and also a good understanding and steady mindset regarding dealing with loneliness and realising it's temporary, and not to let that brief period of it, define how things will be in months time. 


I'm in the best place I've been in a long time, through change, up's and down's, it's all ended up being for the best. I wouldn't change anything, though some I'd like to not go through again. Leave a comment below of one thing that's changed your life, no matter how big or small you think it is. 


with love, Kat 
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1 comment

  1. Kat this post made me so happy! I'm so glad to hear that you're in such an amazing place - keep going gal! Sending lots of love to you! xxx

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